A Kink Life In Retrograde

Someone I'm corresponding with told me yesterday that Mercury is in retrograde. Her cellphone stopped working and all manner of snafus had befallen her. Work was good though she said. I told her that I thought my kink life was in retrograde. I thought that sounded cool and knowing. Kinda catchy though I had no idea what it meant. Mercury, the Winged God of Commerce and Trade, is apparently doing a backwards moonwalk until the end of the month. This little astral dance supposedly messes everything up.

While I'm not much of one to believe in the stars, psychics, fortune tellers, or fables maybe she's onto something. My efforts to engage a connection in my kink life seem all gummed up. For a variety of reasons I'm on hold in my marriage. A comfortable estrangement. No island getaway with She-Who-Visits, who has eloped with Mercury and isn't sending messages. All my flirt friends are either gone or clearly want nothing to do with me. Or they're busy. Or maybe I'm just whining.

This time last year everything seemed so limitless. Everyday an adventure. I was meeeting new people, having amazing interactions on the Max board, and dreaming of a new millenium, kink-style romance. Today I'm feeling stuck knee deep in comfortable, lukewarm, oatmeal slogging my way to who-knows-where. The shrink said yesterday it's just a phase. Mercury whispers quietly - be careful what you wish for.

But I'm ready for some action. Gimme some kind of sign. Maybe things will change when the fleet messenger god reaches his appointed station in the zodiac. Because my schoolday's insane, my work's down the drain, I need to put on my face for a mellow thighed chick to put my spine out of place.